You know, I'm very glad I have a LiveJournal account. Blogging is seriously an amazing destresser... even if no one actually reads them. And it's nice to know that no one that I'm acquainted with in my day-to-day life has any idea of its existance or would ever be able to find it.

Because I like to bitch about them when they do stupid, awful things.

And even if this isn't my problem, per say, it completely affects because...

a) I'm good friends with everyone involved
b) I'm going to college with one of the people
c) I have enough integrity and sense to be able to see when someone has stepped a wee bit out of line

What am I talking about? 

DISNEYLAND PICS

I had so much fun! Well... sort of. Besides being tired of going with my family (third time this year, folks), it's still the happiest place on earth and I can't WAIT until I live ten minutes away and I can go with friends instead! Wooo!

Good times, good times! A lot of these pictures are just blurry repeats of each other, because I haven't gone through and gotten rid of stinkers yet... and a lot of them were taken just to try to be artsy and not boring with my pics, so some of the are... interesting. All the really blurry ones at the end were taken on Soaring Over California... even though I knew they wouldn't turn out. Haha!

And all the ones of the boy walking away... those were taken when my brother got really mad at us. So, naturally, I documented his anger with photography. So funneh!!

I overreacted.

But I was still having a bad day.

My hair just doesn't look completely awful like I thought.

On another note, I'd like to point out that the mullet insanity hit me as I danced in my room to Foux Du Fafa.

Coincidence... I think not.

I'm having the worst few days EVER.

Just small things adding up to shittasticalness.

UGH.

First, I'm feeling weird for whatever reason just because I feel like I'm not confident enough, then I cut my hair for some unknown reason because I though my sidebangs needed trimming and I ended up cutting it backwards and ending up with a fucking mullet, then my sunglasses are broken, then I go to my mom hoping that she'll have some words of comfort, but of course not because she's never has anything nice to say to me, even though she should technically act like I look okay and make me feel better instead of making me feel more stupid... and I have to go to the OC tomorrow looking like shit and feeling sorry for myself. And I won't even be seeing FOTC, most likely, so that sucks too.

And I keep looking at myself in my icon and thinking how much cuter I looked BEFORE I fucked up my hair.

I'm just so bummed.

I feel like I've become this moody person that I don't understand.

I couldn't wait to move out of my house, but now I'm a bit more hesitant since my hair looks like poop.

Fuck. Why can't hair just grow back overnight? This is really embarrassing. I cut it myself last time and there were flaws, but now the old flaws are magnified times a thousand next to the new ones, and I'm really despising myself for being such a dumbass.

Maybe this is a sign that I should cut all my hair off. Or shave my head. I love my long hair, but it's really starting to look awful. I don't want it to go, but I'm thinking that I don't really have much of a choice anymore.

THIS SUCKS. I LOVE MY HAIR.

FUCK FUCK FUCK.

Ew... Scary. And much better than I had expected.

Doug Jones is in this episode 108 - Skin and Bones. He's such an interesting actor. I really want to see Hellboy II!

Check it out... IF YOU DARE.

<- cue cheesy, scary laughter

People telling me when I'm obsessed about something.

Just because I'm particularly interested in something doesn't make me "obsessed". I feel like "obsessed" is an ugly term... It sounds a bit psychotic and negative. If someone was really knowledgeable about medicine, I would never say that they were obsessed with it. I'd say, "WAY TO GO, you're smart. You should be a doctor."

It's really condescending and rude to belittle the things that people like. I'm pissed off that everytime I happen to like something and want to talk about it even a little, the subject gets branded as an "obsession" and I suddenly get to be the butt of jokes.

GUESS WHAT?

I don't like feeling like shit just because I like something a little more than someone else.

I'll decide what to label myself with, thank you very much.

If I was making entire wall collages of paparazzi-esque photos taken without the subject's knowledge, keeping samples of their hair in a drawer, or collecting their garbage... THAT would be an obsession.

I'm so annoyed. Why are there never any people who like the same things as me around when I need them? All I have is people on the internet, but that's not the same. Argh.

So maddening.

This is the video that made me want to see Arj Barker do stand-up. I liked him on FOTC, but my respect and adulation for him went off the charts with this gem from Chicago's Lakeshore theatre.



Am I a bit of a creep for thinking that anger is hot? It's probably wrong and a bit twisted, but ME LIKEY all the same.

Funneh man.

Yeah, I know, I'm super post-happy, but I just have a lot of time on my hands for this kind of stuff.

I just felt like sharing some bumper stickers I made for facebook. They suck, but that's part of the fun...



Ha. Oh man.

My favorite part of these pictures is the fact that the second one was entitled 'superfag' when I saved it. I laughed out loud.

People who take pictures of themselves naked for their website are the best kinds of people.

For the originals, click on "LADIES ONLY!" on the left side of the page.

I hate myself sometimes for being such a freak. Haha!

Oh jeez.

Let me just say one thing...

IT IS WAY TO FREAKING EASY TO GET PEOPLE'S PERSONAL INFORMATION.

IE, home address, phone number, etc.

BAH.

Awful.

I should get paid for being such a stalker. I could go professional.

Argh. Why won't you center, you ungrateful bastard?

If anybody knows how to get that header to go center, let me know. It's making me angry.

Shmanks! ♥

Okay. Here's a bit of insight into my life... I don't know why I felt like writing a detailed description of what I did last night, but I felt like legitimately blogging, so there.

If you don't want to read it all, scroll down to the big number 8 towards the end. Heh.

But anyway. My evening went as follows...

So yesterday, I went on an epic adventure of randomness... Which are the best kind, to be completely honest. I really enjoy the days where I can just go totally crazy and not care...

First, I went to see Step Brothers with my Will Ferrell fan buddy, Tiffany, and her brother, Michael. It kicked our day off to a good start - mainly due to the fact that we were seeing a mat and thus saved $2.50 on movie tickets HOLLA. The movie was pretty damn funny and stupid as hell, just the way I like my movies. Lots of use of the words "vagina", "balls", and "fuck". Loverly.

Afterwords, we drove to Del Taco and had very shitty food. I think there may or may not have been strawberry jelly on my burger. Whatever it was certainly did not share any traits with ketchup, save for the fact that it was red. BLECH.

We wanted some Redlines so we promptly walked over to the Circle K, which was being shut down for whatever reason. It was very odd. The guy who worked there was holding a handwritten sign and standing in the doorway and telling people that he had to go check gas tanks or some such nonsense. I couldn't help but wonder if perhaps maybe actually closing and locking the door to the Circle K would be just as effective as standing there and telling people it was closed. Huh.

We dropped Michael off because he was planning on going to a party later, and decided to continue our quest for our Redlines. First, we drove down to an AMPM. Zilch. Seriously, what kind of operation are these people running? A gas station convenience store that DOESN'T carry Redline?! Man.

Luckily, we just hopped stations to a 7-11 where not only did they keep Redlines in stock, but had five different flavors!! HOLY JESUS!

I grabbed a green apple flavor and Tiffany grabbed... something else, and we paid our money and went out into the car to drink our Redlines.

Which tasted like extract of Jolly Rancher. DAMN. Blech. We gulped them down and blasted The Wombats' 'Kill The Director' so the world could partake in our craziness.

Sadly, the Redlines didn't seem to do all that much. I was hoping for some temporary, good old-fashioned insanity, but no. I'm beginning to see (after my third energy drink in the past week) that perhaps these things do not have the desired effect on my body that they promise to have. Maybe you have to do some sort of special dance to get them to work or something. Who knows. But I've tried Rockstar, Monster, and Redline all within seven days and the most noticeable effect that they've had on my body is foaming mouth and loss of appetite (with the Monster. Of course, those things could have also been caused by seeing a certain comedian, so who knows).

Afterwards, we drove up to Park on Park and took pictures of the sunset and saw a deer run across the road and back again, then drove to Save Mart. We roamed the store, checking out such things as lube and con-damns, as any immature and crazy person would. Tiffany stuck her arm into a battery display after sensing that there was something magical inside, and pulled out a green, gooey, alien fetus blob. I wish I had a picture of it. It was weird. We then grabbed some temporary tattoos and left the store, where Tiffany wanted me to ride a shopping cart to the car. On our way there, she found another green thing... this one was a stuffy in the shape of a green little beany object, with leaves growing off of its head. I don't know how she keeps finding these things, but good on her. They're probably a bit unsanitary though, but you only live once to get diseases off of ugly childrens' toys!!

We drove up to one of the high school's and ran through the sprinklers singing "Singing in the Rain", drove through an elderly neighborhood, then took the freeway over to our friend's neighborhood (he said he would hang out with us, but was being a bit evasive). He wasn't home, so we went to the park by his house to swing and play in some more sprinklers. We scared off a couple who were looking for a quiet moment, but HEY, such is life. We tried to talk to another one of our dude friends, but he was being a little bit of a V-A-gina because he'd sunburnt his lips the day before and was feeling like "a dinosaur." Personally, when something awkward happens to my appearance, I show it off as much as possible because it makes me feel special. If my lips were swollen all the way up to my nose and the bottom of my chin, you can bet I would want the world to see my Angelina Jolie face. I told Tiffany that I had heard that there was a kidnapper going around trying to abduct women in our area, and right on schedule, a black truck pulled up by the park. A very large man got out of the truck and we were worried that we were going to be raped, but we saw a girl get out a second later, and figured we were safe as long as there was a lady with him.

8

To our surprise, we knew the couple (and had actually just been discussing the sexual exploits of the guy, COINCIDENTALLY), so that was hilarious. We wanted to give them alone time, so we went to drive the hood until our other friend got back to his house. We called him and asked him when he would be back, and, in an effort to try to get him home sooner, Tiffany told him we had "epic stories" to tell him. He seemed excited to hear our "epic stories". Unfortunately, we had none.

We felt the pressure to think of something absolutely mind-blowing as though we were two marshmallows on a spit. We pulled over in the neighborhood adjacent to his and thought. I had just told Tiffany about how this same guy had embarrassed me in front of Arj Barker by calling me "ugly" in front of him, which she had thought was pretty funny. Thus, I thought a story related to Arj Barker would be quite interesting...

WHICH IS WHEN WE THOUGHT OF THE BEST STORY OF ALL TIME:

And this story goes as follows.

When I went to see Arj and had him autograph my bandana, I was so excited that I didn't really look at the thing for a while after he'd signed it. However, yesterday, I was looking at my bandana, when I realized that if I unfolded the thing a bit, there was something more than just a signature and the word "lonely" written on it... in fact, there was a phone number.

Curious, I texted the number. "Who is this?" I asked. A minute or so later, I got a message back. "Who is THIS?"

Fake!Arj gave me his phone number, I suspect!! I'm taking things slow so I don't freak him out, but MAN!

...

Totally unbelievable, right?

Well, my friend ate it up. I think he thinks that Arj and I are destined to have babies together now. HAHAHAHAHA. And we are in no way, shape, or form done with this story.

That will teach you to call me ugly in front of my favorite comedian.

Stay tuned.

Anybody know how to make a good LJ layout? Or where to find one? Or can explain making one to me in a very friendly, easy way? I'm all about customization, and I'd like to make my LJ prettyish and representative of myself... Shmanks in advance to anyone nice enough to help!

Stop looking at me, Arj. I'm starting to get a bit freaked out by my icon.

I'm a bit sad I didn't get a way close look at his car or license though. Sounds absolutely creepy, but where he lives isn't all that big and is pretty close to where I live... I could have gone on a Arj hunt. WHAT WHAT.

I scare myself really bad sometimes. I hope I never meet anyone like me that likes me the way that I like famous people. Gah.

Bret gives you thirteen of his favorite places in LA:

THE LIST.

This is stalker material, kids. And I fully intend to use it.

Oh man. The more I think about the Arj Barker show, the more I realize how weird I must have been.

I was standing way too close to the poor man. I never do that, so it's very odd that I did. Like, literally. I was so close that he accidentally wrote on my arm. I don't know what that was about, but hey. I'm not complaining. HAHA!

I still have the Sharpie mark on my arm too. Poor man. He must have felt weird having to look down at such a sharp angle. I'M SO FRICKIN' SHORT, dammit.

I'm just praying that for whatever reason, he happens to be in LA for the Largo show and I happen to get tickets to the Largo show and I can talk to him and redeem myself and my sanity. He won't remember how weird I was or me period, but it'll make me feel better just to tell him that I was dehydrated and confused. HAHAHAHA.

Oh my. Too much thought is going into this meaningless encounter.

WELL.

I went and saw Arj Barker last night at Punch Line in Sac.

And let me tell you...

FUCKING AWESOME.

But anyway. Here's an account of the events.

My friends and I got there an hour before the doors even opened, because we're awesome like that. We wanted to make sure we would get the best seats EVA, so we showed up at a time we thought was appropriate to get some up front and center action. We'd never been to a show at Punch Line, which is on the second floor of a strip mall-esque shopping center, right above a nail salon and next to a Sleep Train store. So, in other words, pretty much the BEST, most crazy-legit comedy club I have ever heard of. Haha!

Okay, so we get let in at 7:30 and get to sit very close (unfortunately, the closest seats are for parties of two, so we had to sit behind the people right in front of the stage, so that was unfortunate, but good at the same time because baby Jesus knows I would have been freaking out if the comedians had tried to use me in their jokes during the show (I DON'T THINK WELL ON MY FEET UNDER PRESSURE). I ordered a Monster to get some energy juice flowing through my body (and to dehydrate me for later, as I'm realizing right now that I feel like I have a desert living inside my body).

My friends and I chatted for about fifty minutes or so, when I looked over my friends should towards the bar, and who should be standing there but Arj himself! It was WAAAAY trippy... I mean, I had been watching this guy on a TV show fanatically for a while, and had scene most everything youtube had to offer of his comedy acts, and he was standing literally less than four yards from me!! My friends and I were all so excited!!!

Anyway, the show started a few minutes after he popped out. He wasn't the first to go, as the headliner, so we got to see a couple other guys first. Alex Koll went first, and I'd say his spot ran for about ten minutes. He was okay. I was nervous because I didn't know what to expect, so I didn't laugh as much as I could have.

Next was Brent Weinbach. Now let me tell you, this guy is CRAZY HILARIOUS. He acts completely insane!! I would absolutely go see him do another show if he ever comes around again! WONDERFUL WONDERFUL WONDERFUL. I wish we could have talked to him a bit, but everyone was in a hurry to skiddadle at the end, but that's later.

ANYWAY! Next was Arj! He was amazing! I feel like his set went on for an hour or something, which totally surprised me! He must have gone through every joke possible! He had to consult the black book (LOVE, yes to looking at notes on stage) because we were going through jokes so fast (we were "ravenous" according to him). I wish I could just go through the entire thing right here, but that would be long and ridiculous. Highlights were things like when he was running out of things to talk about and this one guy shouted out "Health food!" and he was like, "I think you should really talk to the wait staff about that one. This is the Punch Line Comedy Club, not... the magical room where whatever you want appears if you yell it out loud!" Then another guy yelled "Marijuana!" and then Arj was like, "Okay. Why don't we just yell 'BLOW JOBS!'?" and we all started laughing like crazy. I don't know why it was so funny, but it just was. When a man yells BLOW JOBS at the top of his lungs for no apparent reason (well... besides the obvious one), it is a beautiful thing.

Er... other stuff was funny too. It was great, because everytime a joke did so-so or whatever, he made jokes about our reactions. Adlibbing probably gave us some of the funniest stuff. He also talked to my friend Erin during the show when he wanted to talk about Ireland. He asked if anyone was from there, and she woohooed a little, so he asked her if she was from there, which she wasn't, but her family was, so he apologized for the innacuracy of his accent for his next joke, in which he was going to impersonate an Irish person. He did an Indian accent. HAHA!

SO MANY GOOD JOKES. He is honestly just freaking amazing and I loved being five feet away from him during the show. SO ATTRACTIVE, too. I wish I was crazy-hot/sexy/not young and uncomfortable because DAYUM, if I wouldn't have put the moves on him if I was someone completely different than myself!

Well, the show ended and everyone was happy. We waited a while before going outside (we figured that if everyone cleared out, we'd have more time to Arj... and we were just nervous to go outside and talk to him). HOWEVER, he was in a hurry and wanted to get out of there pretty soon because he was going to have to wake up at 4 the next day to take a flight or something sad (as my friend asked him when he looked like he was getting antsy to leave). So we jumped in there and had little bit of time with him... which went as follows:

MY FRIENDS MADE ME TALK FIRST BECAUSE THEY HATE ME. They must forget that I get extremely weird or something, because why the hell would they ever let me go near someone I know a bit too much about?!

Me: Whew. (Hand motions over face in a centering motion) I need to just... gather myself really quick.
Arj: (Probably extremely disturbed/frightened/God knows) I like to consult the ball of fire (looking down at crumpled plastic in his hands).
Me: You were great. (Something like that. DUMB STUFF)

No idea what transpired for a moment.

Me: We were really excited that you talked to her during the show (gesturing to my friend)
Erin: I was the Irish girl.
Arj: Oh yeah. Did you see them touring? Haha.
(Generation gap confuses Erin over this joke. I think we were all confused. We got a picture with him then, I think)
Other friend, Richie: Olivia, you look awful in this picture.
(I am offended. Thank you for insulting me in front of greatness, Richie.)
Me: Can I get you to sign some stuff?
Arj: Sure.
Me: There are a few things... I brought my whole arsenal with me.
Arj: Okay.
(Gets Flight of the Conchords DVD out)
Arj: You've got the DVD? Okay.
(Signs the inside.)

I'm happy to report that the little DVD holder ma-bobs broke of temporarily, which was rather LOVELY. He had to put it back together after he popped them out. I can tell people that Arj Barker dismantled my DVD case now. WOOT. Inside he wrote "Arj Barker, XOXO", so I take this as a sign that he loves me. Just kidding. He doodled on my arm a bit by accident. I must have been standing ridiculously close. I don't know why. HAHA. Next, I handed him a bandana, because that's how I roll. He signed it "Lonely, Arj Barker".

Arj: I'm thinking of getting these made so that they say "Lonely" on one side and "Legend" on the other side and selling them.
Me: Oh, I would definitely buy one if you do. Please do.

He was about to peace out when my guy friends got a quick picture with him too, then he went back inside and told us that he hoped we'd come see another show, and we all said we would, then we left. We went out to my car and waited a few minutes to see him leave the building in typical weirdo fashion. We got to see him take a murse to a silver car, then we got freaked out by our own stalkerness and drove away. I should have driven by slower... we could have got his license. HAHA. JUST KIDDING.

I'm way bummed that he was in such a hurry, though! He was so nice... I think that us feeling rushed led to my temporary insanity (though I wasn't as afraid as I thought I'd be... he's really, REALLY nice, so he's not a scary person to talk to). I wanted to ask him about Marin, where he lives, because I was literally JUST THERE two days ago. I probably saw him and had no idea. WOO!

Anyway! If you ever get a chance to see him, DO IT. He is really hilarious and lovely and not Dave-like at all. I want to go see him again and talk to him when he's not halfway out the door already. And not have to center myself. HAHA. Thank God he won't remember this in a week. If I meet him again, it'll be a fresh start. Unless he magically remembers me. Doubt it.

HOT HOT HOT man. So attractive. BEST NIGHT EVER. I'm really bummed it's over, and I had a hard time sleeping because I was so tossy-turny saddish/regretful that it had all already happened and that we didn't get to do or say everything we had planned (WE WANTED A GROUP BIRD PICTURE). Next time... next time.

♥

I'm on the left. <3



Check out the Flickr gallery!

No idea.

Dave is scary. But I love him.

SPEAKING OF WHICH, I'm going to see Arj next Wednesday. WOOOOOOOOO. Maybe the Conchords will be there. Not. But wouldn't that be nice? Haha!

Note:

Christian Bale is teh sexay.

That is all.

I was doodling a Jemaine when I realized that he looked more like a Jarrod.

So I turned him into a Jarrod.

Then I drew Jarrod and Lily and used some intense, deep, perceptive dialogue to explain their relationship.

Ah, yup.